Why I Need To Find Me

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I need to find me.  Weight Watchers (or WW as they like to be called now) has given me a very unhealthy relationship with food.

When I first started out, I really needed them.  I needed to get portions under control, I needed to eat healthier, I needed to lose weight.  The WW program at the time was the original point program which in the first 3 months of my membership switched to points plus.  I loved these programs.  Not only did it provide me guidelines to follow, it taught me portion control, making healthier choices and I lost 40 lbs. bringing me to a Lifetime Membership within the year.  Then I walked away….

And then, you know what happened.  I tried to get it under control by doing the program on my own and/or going back…but that original enthusiasm wasn’t there and I’d end up paying WW to lose and gain the same 10 lbs over and over.

A few years back, I once again walked into a meeting and rejoined.  The first few weeks I kept noticing a sign that said “Coming Soon – The Biggest Change In 50 Years”.  I felt somewhat relieved…”great, they are doing away with points”.  Points have a bad habit of controlling your life; even if you’re doing another program you still have this point calculation going on in your head.  It’s like you’ve been brainwashed.  The biggest change, however, was not doing away with points; as a matter of fact, it wasn’t a big change at all just another point program, smart points.  At first I jumped right in, thought the change would help, but it didn’t.  I’d sit in meetings where all these people would lose tons of weight – I’m not kidding you when I say that one lady lost 30 lbs in a 2 week period (is that even possible? or healthy?); I was losing/gaining tenths of a pound.  It was depressing, so I did what every other depressed overweight person does – I ate.  I one time was able to say that I had a 4 lb loss; but it only occurred because I had switched back to the old program – points plus.  A big no-no, we don’t mention past programs because smart points is the best program.  I hated smart points, smart points was a huge fail for me (and I have no issue with those that loved it).  For some reason I continued paying WW and kept going.

Then all of a sudden, smart points wasn’t the best.  They changed to Free Style, giving you a list of foods that could be counted as 0 pts and leaving you daily/weekly smart points for anything off the list.  Since this seemed a step towards their hidden plan Simply Filling, I felt I could get on board.  But, no….I had been pointed out and WW out for too long of a period.  They could have spoon fed me and it would not have worked.  But I’ve continued on……paying them for nothing.

Back in December, I finally decided to hit that cancel button; and WW came back with 2 free months…so I’ve continued.  And that 2 months is coming to an end and it’s left me struggling with should I continue? or is it truly time to move on?

Last meeting a sub was doing the weigh-in (the receptionists are now called “guides”) and out of the blue she asked me “What did you do nice for yourself this past week?”  I was a little taken back, can’t we skip chit-chat and just weigh?  She repeated herself so I answered “I ate food”.  Certainly not the answer she wanted to hear but she fakingly laughed it off and since I had a small loss (those tenths again) she delcared I had done well.  I couldn’t help but wonder what she’d of said if I had gained.

Then I came across this blog post:  Requiem for a Weight Watcher and saw myself all through it!  It was very eye opening and made me decide that I needed to end my relationship with WW.

I may try Points Plus again using the unofficial app itrackbites or I may go with calorie counting or I may just watch what and how much I eat.  Either choice is free and let’s me watch my own weight rather than vice versa.

So I’ve started over this blog for the hundredth time, to try to get a good journey started.

Join me, wish me luck!

 

 

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Author:

I lost 40 lbs. in 2010/2011 with Weight Watchers and became a lifetime member; but the loss didn't last a lifetime so technically I'm a Weight Watchers failure! Join me on my next journey and share yours!

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